My Jams ’83

Cheerleading shot of Gwin

 

Hey, it’s good to see you!  Boy have I got a lot to catch you up on!  I’m so sorry that I haven’t been keeping you posted on all the things that’s been going on.  Can you believe that we’re almost at the end of 1983 and I haven’t really told you anything new?

Well, I guess I better do like Lewis Carroll said, “Start at the beginning, keep going and when you come to the end, stop.”

So let’s start at the beginning.

Do you remember my Uncle Willie? You know the one who lives in Chicago?  Well he died back in March.  Nobody saw it coming because he was kinda young.  They say he was sick with pneumonia, then he just had a heart attack–out of nowhere– and died.

We didn’t see him much but I do remember the time me and my cousins were jumping on the bed at my grandma’s house and he told us to stop or he would whip us.  To be honest, we didn’t think that he could do that.   So one of us (it could have been me) mumbled, “If you do, I’ll tell my mama.”  Well, little did we know, he overheard that.  Before you know it, he said, “I’ll whip you and call your mama and tell her I whipped you, now go sit yo’ little asses down somewhere!”

After he said that, we went somewhere and sat down.

Anyway, Uncle Willie was the first dead person I ever saw.  He didn’t look the same as he used to; he was still handsome though.  But you know what? I wasn’t scared, he just looked like he was asleep.

By the way, Uncle Willie was mama’s youngest brother so she took it real hard.

Anyway, so right after Uncle Willie died, it was April I think, me and my friend Sandra decided to try-out for the junior varsity cheerleading squad at the high school.  We did this after we heard an announcement at our middle school that called for 8th graders to come to cheerleading clinic/try-outs.  We were kinda lucky because one of our older family friends, Carol, told us all about the kinds of jumps that we would have to know how to do.  She warned us that in high school they don’t cheer like we did when we were doing cheers in elementary.  She told us that we had to be stiff as a board.  No shaking and jiggling; just straight up stiff.

Well every day, after school, Sandra and I walked up to the high school for the clinic.  The first day that we got there, the varsity cheerleaders were already calling the coach to look at my toe touch.  Believe it or not, I could jump as high as the best jumper.  Sandra was a great jumper too.  Both of us knew the coach was watching really hard.  After that, I figured we were gonna make the squad and we did.

Once we started going to high school, we learned that being a JV cheerleader had good sides and bad sides.  The good side is that everybody at the school recognizes you, the bad side is, they don’t really care.  At pep rallies, we had to cheer from the sidelines while the varsity cheerleaders danced and chanted the fight song in a moving circle.  On the second verse of the song, each cheerleader had to run in front of the stands where their class was sitting.  Because we were freshmen we had to run to the freshmen side.  The sad part about that is the freshmen side was large but they didn’t never clap; not even when we did chants that call for each class to respond back to us.  Honestly, I felt real stupid out there!  Oh yeah, and don’t even talk about the football games.  Nobody comes to JV games.

Man, I can’t wait to be a varsity cheerleader!

Ok, so I think I got you all caught up!

Anyway, tonight I went to my first hop at the school gym.  What do you mean you don’t know what a hop is? Well, where I’m from, a hop is another word for a dance.  Somebody told me that the name ‘hop’ probably comes from the 1950’s when they used to call a dance a ‘sock hop.’ I guess they took their shoes off and hopped around in their socks.

By the way, if you ever watch American Bandstand then you know the theme song says ‘We’re going hopping.’  Well, anyway, it’s the same thing.

Back to what I was talking about before I got off-track.

Oh yeah!  Now, to tell you the truth, tonight, I was nervous because I had never danced with a boy before.  When we first got there, I just sat in the stands drinking a coke.  Everybody else was dancing while I watched.

Finally, a boy that I never seen before, asked me to dance with him. I think he went to Glenn Hills.  Anyway, we danced to “Sticky Situation” by Tyrone Brunson.  It was fun because everybody was doing the smurf at the same time.  Then, all of a sudden, the DJ pulled a fast one on me.  He changed songs right in the middle of us dancing.  Next thing you know, he was playing “Lady in my life.”

I was like, “Holy Crud!”  You know I LOVE that song but I freaked out because this boy put his arms around my waist and pulled me waaay too close to him. I started to tell him to step off but I was too scared.

🙂 🙂 🙂

Uh oh!  Lil Lady G, you in a pickle now!  Hell, that boy had to be 16 or 17 years old!  He wanted to slow dance and he wanted to do it real close.  Where is Mr. Carribeanish when you need him? Chile everybody at the hop was damn near grinding and dry humping and you know what I’m talking about!

Well, our dear Lady G was not about that life!  Not yet anyway.

Memory fades as to how your girl got out of that sticky wicket!  I just know that I did—somehow.

Well, well, well! Welcome to 1983!  Yaaasss!

This.  This year here.  This year right here. Baby, with very few exceptions, this is the year when the R&B musicians and instruments exited- stage left.  Chile anybody with a synthesizer could make a record back then; and trust me, they did.

By now rap music was in full swing.

For better or for worse, we were getting used to a new normal. Music was crossing genres left and right!

Anyway, what were you doing in 1983?  Don’t hold back none!  Give me all the goods down in the comment section.

And so…

Shall we proceed?  Yes, indeed!

My Jams ‘83

Let’s dance by David Bowie

“Put on your red shoes and dance the blues…”  Was it just me or did he sound like Dracula?

YAAASSSSS!  I love me some David Bowie!  Dude had his own style and I ate it up!

Not only did I love his voice and his style but I love and respect the fact that Bowie was one of the first big name acts to call MTV out for not playing black musicians!  Baby, he got all up in the interviewers grill.  By the time that thang was over the VeeJay (New term with the advent of videos) was sweating bullets!

Needless to say, ya girl broke down in the middle of the Publix frozen section when I found out he died earlier this year.

Chile, we had no idea, at the time, that 2016 would claim so many great entertainers before the first half of the year was even over.

China Girl by David Bowie

“Oh Oh Oh Oh Little China Girl!”

No way I’m leaving 1983 without adding my Bowie favorite!

 PYT by Michael Jackson

Lady G is a PYT!

For newcomers, PYT stands for Pretty Young Thing.

Who the hell am I fooling?  I ain’t seen young in 30 years.

I can dream though.

Time will reveal by DeBarge

Oh honey, Bobby Debarge’s little brothers and sister blew onto the scene-do you hear me?

Trust and believe that they were not messing around.

This one right here was the joint!

El Debarge’s voice is like silk baby!

Stay with me tonight by Jeffrey Osborne

“Baby stay with me tonight”

I most certainly will baby!  You ain’t gotta ask me twice.

Try again by Champagne

“Maybe we can try again…try, try”

I just love the way they sang that part!

Some people tried again and some people opted NOT to.

Hell Will Downing, in his cover of Angela Bofill’s masterpiece, would later say, “I tried and I tried and I tried and I tried!

You can consider that one a bonus ‘cause I don’t know if we’ll make it that far into the future!

Don’t you get so mad by Jeffrey Osborne

“Do you have to get so mad?”

Hell yeah and you know good and damn well why I’m mad.  Don’t try to play me Jeffrey!

 Juicy fruit by Mtume

“I’ll be your lollipop, you can like me everywhere!”

Holy shit!  Did she just say that? LICK ME EVERYWHERE?

I ain’t mad at her!  That’s how I like to get down but it was pushing the hell out of the envelope back then.

Oh but Marvin Sease would later say something that pushed the envelope off the damn desk. But since that song falls into the blues genre it is out of my wheelhouse.

 All night long by the Mary Jane girls

“Come on up boy don’t be late, what I got for you won’t wait….All night long!”

Shiiitttt!

“Climb up on the ladder honey, what I got is better than money…All night long!”

I didn’t know what the hell they were talking about back then but damn if I didn’t learn later!

“You got me shook up, shook down, shook out on your loving…and boy there is just no way I’ll ever get over you….All night long, I waited for you, to show you my love and on this rooftop I’ll be waiting for your love anticipating, hurry up and come ‘cause I can’t wait to get it on”

Y’all better stop me! I could pull lyrics from this song all night long!

 Outstanding by The Gap Band

Yaaasss!  Uncle Charlie been kicking it for years!

I loved this one because it brought us a little bit of brass action and you know how much I love me some brass!

 Tell me if you still care by SOS band

When you get ready to shut the shit down….put this jam on!

Folks will start running and hollering!  Mayhem!  Sheer Mayhem!

That damn drum pattern?  Whaaaat?  I just can’t!  I CANNOT!

“Do you feel the same way too?”

“Listen to my heartbeat…for you baby…oooh!”

Asystole! (google it!)

Mind up tonight by Melba Moore

Thank you Lordt, thou hast given us thine bass!  And it was good!

“Am I number one or number two?  Am I your woman?”

“Gotta make your mind up tonight…”

YAAASSSS!

 Wet my whistle by Midnight Star

Brother said he had to wet his whistle when he kissed her lips!

Now which whistle is that? Hell, which lips?

“Just a little bit, just a little bit, a little bit baby!”

Girl watch him or you might be at the clinic tomorrow suffering from infant or infection—at this time in your life neither of these is a good thing!

Every girl wants my guy by Aretha Franklin

Aretha girl I understand that feeling.  Lady G ain’t never kicked it with a dude that some heffa didn’t want.  Hell, she might have even had him but I can guarantee you that Lady G remains all up in his dome—at all times!  Baby, he won’t leave until I let him go.

I’m just kidding, but not really 😉

 Crazy by the Manhattans

Don’t call it a comeback!

Ok, I won’t.

But the fact remains that we ain’t heard from these jokers in years!

No matter, this was a good jam.  Gerald Alston will ALWAYS bring it; trust and believe that!

 Atomic dog by George Clinton

YAAAAAASSSS!

This one was that fire in 1983!

Chile y’all know Omega Psi Phi decided to cop it right!?

But I ain’t mad at the Ques for stepping and shooting funk to this jam!

(TOTO 24, Kamala, 6, PSI Chapter –Spring ’91) 

Now if curiosity gets the better of you, I can give you a translation for all of that, just holler at me in comments!  But for now, here’s a hint, Kamala would go on to bless me with a beautiful baby boy.

‘Nuff said!

 Lucky Star by Madonna

“You may be my lucky star but I’m the luckiest by far!”

YAAASSSS!  Ms. Madonna crossed her ass right on over to the R&B charts with this jam!

You better recognize!  Black folks love them some Madonna!

 Say it isn’t so by Hall and Oates

Speaking of love, black people definitely had mad love for these two dudes!  It ain’t no way I am leaving 1983 without talking about this jam!

Over and over by Shalamar

So I had a new crush in 1983.  He was a handsome dude who drove his brother’s tricked out Toyota Celica GT! Do you remember those?  If you don’t, google it ‘cause they don’t make ‘em no more.  Anyway, I used to sit and look out the window and watch him drive by.  This song was usually playing in the background.  This one and Shalamar’s other jams “Right here” and “Dead giveaway.”

 Owner of a lonely heart by Yes

AW SHIIIITTT Did you hear that guitar at the beginning?  YAAASSSS!

Hot!  Hot!  Hot!

This jam is soooooo NOT R&B but black people loved the hell out of it!  Let’s face it, when a jam is as nasty as this is, it cannot be contained in one genre!

“Owner of a lonely heart, Owner of a lonely heart, much better than the owner of a broken heart…”

I rocks this jam right now-TODAY!

I’ll Tumble for ya by Culture Club

I am adding this one for kicks! I loved the hell out of this jam.

Don’t worry; I can’t even list all of my Culture Club favorites!  No room for all that!

But all I gotta say is “Time won’t give me time and time makes lovers feel like they got something real but you and me we know we got nothing but time and time won’t give me time…”

I lived for Boy George!

Believe it or not, Mama liked him too; she just didn’t know what to make of him though.

 Choosey lover by The Isley brothers

Ok, let’s get back to some stone cold straight up R&B

“Choosey lover, girl I’m so proud of ya, I’m so glad you chose me, and I’ll make you so happy…”

I SIMPLY CANNOT!

Ron’nem wasn’t even playing.  Ernie!  Whaaat?????  I soooo needed to hear some real instruments! Chris and Marvin ain’t playing either.

Candy man by the MaryJane girls

YAAASSSS!  The Mary Jane Girls!  Remember, they brought us “All Night Long!”

I always thought of these sisters as Rick James’ answer to Prince’s Vanity 6.

Let’s just say that the Mary Jane girls sat Vanity 6 and  Apollonia 6 or whoever’s asses right on DOWN!

 Is this the end by New Edition

Chile look a’here!  We got us a little play-pretend Jackson 5!

Ralph could hold a tune but he wasn’t no Mike!

No matter, them boys won my heart!

 Ms. Got the Body by ConFunkShun

Oh baby, unlike Cameo, Michael’nem were not yet ready to throw their instruments away!

Do I sound miffed?

Anyway, ConFunkShun blew that brass right on into the ‘80’s!  YAAASSSS!

“Ms.Got the Body…like sweet cold wine, that girl is so fine!”

 Jealous Girl by New Edition

I cried my ass off to this jam!  Still don’t know why.  I didn’t have no man so I didn’t have nothing to be jealous about.

No matter, this little ditty tended to elicit hysterics from all the teenage girls!

 The Haunted House of Rock by Whodini

Nope, it surely is not R&B; in fact, it’s a rap recording but it was a novelty song

so I loved it.

In fact, it still plays well at any Halloween party!

 

Now let’s see what Eva and Tack were listening to

Party time by Kurtis Blow

Holiday by Madonna

Let you down by Maze

Starting something by Michael Jackson

Little red corvette by Prince

One on one by Hall and Oates

Candy girl by New Edition

Ain’t Nobody Chaka Khan

Last night a DJ saved my life by Indeep

I like it by DeBarge

Get it right by Aretha Franklin

Stop doggin me around by Klique—Mama liked this better than Jackie Wilson’s original, now that’s saying something!

Between the sheets by the Isley brothers

You are in my system by The System

Taxi by J Blackfoot

Keep on loving me by The Whispers

Baby I’m hooked by ConFunkShun

You said enough by Central Line

Style by Cameo

Jam on it by Newcleus

Beat it by Michael Jackson

Fall in love with me by EWF

Save the overtime by Gladys Knight and the Pips

Trouble in paradise by Al Jarreau

Got to be there by Chaka Khan

Slow jam by Midnight Star

Hand dance by The Reddings

Do you like it by Slave

Strut my Thang by Ozone

Ladies choice by Stone City Band

Weak at the knees by Steve Arrington

Help yourself by Kashif

Real love by Lakeside

How come you don’t call me anymore by Stephanie Mills

My first love Rene and Angela

Betcha she don’t love you by Evelyn Champagne King

Call blooded by Rick James

Beat it by Michael Jackson

Curses! The clock is striking 12:00!  I love you 1983 but I gotta be out!

Share your memories of 1983 in comments!  I’m waiting for you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everyday Randomness

I don’t know about y’all but I needs ME a break from the anger, outrage and sadness that we have all experienced this past weekend, so I decided to share some pictures of everyday randomness.  WHEW!!!!

The first of these pictures is from 1998 but the others are current.

I am grateful to God for the many blessings that I have in my life.

Enjoy!

batman
Batman circa 1998
caricature of brah
Caricature of Tack!  Did you have to ask?
Chilean Sea Bass
Friday’s lunch at PF Chang’s
Cous doing yoga
My Cousin Rasul doing yoga–Now it’s your turn. I’ll pass!
flipflopEND
THE END…of these shoes!
hairwash day
The answer to your question is yes and I have to detangle and wash all this stuff! I’m scared to dye it but the gray is driving me nuts. Hopefully I’ll learn to embrace it!
homemade guac
Black girls do Mexican–My Guac is fire!
PF chang's sign
Bringers of DAMN good Chilean Sea Bass in Oolong Tea with Spinach
rosa regale
Cocktails anyone?  Hell yeah!
pho
I love Pho but I HATE cilantro!

 

Is that random enough?  Hope you enjoyed sharing a slice of my life!  Questions?  Hit me up in comments!

It’s Personal

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Updated:  6/13/2016 at 11:02am EST

If you have spent any amount of time on this blog then you already know a little bit about me; including the fact that I have two children whom I love dearly.

My youngest is 10 years old and my oldest is 22.  Yeah, I realize that there is a big difference in their ages but that’s just how the chips fell in my life and I wouldn’t change a thing about that.

Suffice it to say that my babies are my heart. And I mean that!  With that said, as a mother, I am sick to death of watching the aftermath of a deranged lunatic’s murderous rampage against our nation’s children.

Just to be clear, for the purposes of this post, the terms ‘child’ or ‘children’ are applied to anyone who has not yet attained the age of  150.

Sorry folks but your mother sees you as her child -I don’t give a damn how old you are.

At any rate, in 2012, like most folks, I was glued to the TV when the Sandy Hook shootings occurred.  I watched and cried as parents buried baby after baby after baby after baby.

I agonized as they eulogized the brave adults who lost their own lives trying to save their young students.

During that time, I remember looking at my youngest child (who was the same age as those kids) and thinking surely this massacre will be the turning point!  Surely, all parents will come together and take a stand!  Surely we can all agree that no civilian needs to own a freaking arsenal of semiautomatic rifles! Surely, this is the last straw!

The last straw!  Right?

Oh hell no, it was NOT the last straw.  In fact, there were many more murders to come and go. Each one resulting in a whole lot of nothing– from a legislative perspective.

Then this!  The worse mass murder in U. S. history.

So who were the victims this time?  I’ll tell you who they were.  They were people, just like you or me; out having a good time.  Many of them were young people who were about my son’s age with their whole lives ahead of them.

So what if most of them were members of the LGBTQ community?

To me, that’s beside the point!

The real and sobering fact of the matter is this, each and every person in that club was somebody’s son, daughter, uncle, aunt, brother, sister, father, mother, lover, husband, or wife ….and, to me,  that MAKES IT PERSONAL!

Now if you don’t believe it should be taken personally, read this article about a text conversation between a mother and her son.  By the way, this text conversation took place while this woman’s son was in attendance at The Pulse in Orlando, Florida this past Saturday night; the scene of the aforementioned mass murders.

Mind you, when this post was published, there had been no word on this young man’s fate. (Update:  Sadly, CNN has confirmed that this young man, Eddie Jamoldroy Justice, did not survive.)

Friends, when I read this article, I couldn’t help but cry for this mother, Mina Justice, because one of her son’s first messages to her was “Mommy, I love you.”  I cried because I have received that same type of message from my own son.

Frankly, I would argue that if you can read the above exchange, between mother and child, and remain unaffected, may God bless your numbed soul.

In fact, may God bless us all anyway –because we need it.

 

But it’s still personal and I am no longer planning to watch from the sidelines.

Not anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ron’s Time Tunnel: Creek Can’t Fish

christ-in-the-storm-1633

“Master!” Creek sang. His cool, strong, clear tenor arched out of the choir stand; filling the entire church with its richness; mesmerizing those upon whose ears the unique, vibrato-less voice fell, at times, gently; at others, sharply.  Derrell’s masterful manipulation of the keys of the time worn, upright piano, harmoniously echoed Creeks prayerful delivery of the word, “Master!” “Theeeeeee tempest!” he continued, his voice rising from the depths of that place that all great soloist must harbor within their bodies and souls, then rising towards higher and higher, nigh heavenly heights; a crescendo followed faithfully by the entrancing sounds of the piano accompaniment which now rumbled forth like the roll of the distant thunder of a violent storm, as it made its approach over the horizon. “Is raging!” Creek softly concluded the first line of the song. During the brief, dramatic pause, I heard somebody whisper, “Creek can sang.” “Yes,” I thought to myself, “but he sho can’t fish!”

How did I know that Creek couldn’t fish? Creek had gone fishing with me, my brother and dad several times. But we weren’t at the “Backup Water” this day, we were in church and Creek was singing, not fishing. His wide shoulders rose, as he filled his powerful lungs with air. His narrow face, with its strong chin and cheekbones, snatched to the right, as if glancing back over his shoulder. The storm was approaching! “Theeeeeee billow-o-ooooooows!” again his voice rising to a crescendo then falling softly, “are tossing, hi-iiiigh”.  Then again, booming, “The sky is o’er shadooooooowed with blackneeesss!” then gently “No shelter…no shelter…or help is… ni-iiigh!” Shouts of “Sing it boy! Sing it!” and “Alright nigh!” arose from the congregation! Derrell, brought the storm closer; thunder booming. Somebody elbowed me, “He can sang can’t he?” I gave them a perfunctory smile, “Why yes, he’s my cousin you know” I answered proudly, even as another, quieter thought lingered; “but he sho can’t fish!”

How did I know that Creek couldn’t fish? Because, whenever he’d go fishing with us and someone got a nibble or a bite, he’d withdraw his line from its current locale and, “swoosh, plop!” deposit it directly into the spot where the person had just caught a fish or got a bite; a la a “boy called Man.” But we weren’t at “The Pasture” this day. We were in church and Creek wasn’t fishing, he was singing. “Carest…Thou… not… that… weeeeeee pe-rish?” he intoned boldly, angrily, then pleadingly he queried, “How canst Thou lie therrrrrre…asleep?” “You talking to Jesus like that boy?” said the devil, at least the voice sounded like how I thought the devil should sound. I looked around, but saw only the “faithful few.” Creek’s shoulder rose, his head snatched to the left. He continued, “When each moment… sooooooo madlyyyyyyy is threatening, aaaaaaa grave, a grave, a grave… in the angryyy deep? The storm was upon us. Creek’s fabulous voice told us so. We were doomed! These were the feelings we felt as we rode the waves of the ominous melody and heeded the warnings described so vividly by Creek’s dexterous delivery of the song’s verses. “Man he can sing,” I said, to no one in particular. “If he could fish, he’d be awesome,” but alas,  I thought between the musical waves rocking us, “Creek can’t fish.”

How did I know that Creek couldn’t fish? He would frequently get his fishing line entangled with the fishing line of his fellow fishermen. From somewhere, I felt a cool breeze as the rhythm and pace of the song changed. The other men in the choir; Congo, Tat, Fletch, Buster, Reatha, Willie J., Derrell, and Dump joined in the chorus singing in perfect harmony;

“The winds and the waves shall obey my will, peace be still

Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea

Or demons or men or whatever it be

No water can swallow the ship where lies

The Master of ocean and earth and skies

They shall sweetly obey my will

Peace be still, peace be still

They all shall sweetly obey my will, peace, peace be still”

As their voices trailed off, the church grew quiet, the breeze I’d felt earlier, suddenly stopped. The church was still; peaceful. Suddenly! The congregation burst into cheers, handclaps and foot stomps. Creek and the boys brought the house down. Maybe Creek couldn’t fish, but boy that man could sing!

P.S. Years later, after many days of fishing with my father, Creek did eventually become one hell of a fisherman.

NEXT WEEK: CONGO’S CARGO

My Jams ’82

Gwin for 1982

 

Warning:  This post contains adult language and adult situations.  Oh and it’s long as hell too!  So get comfortable before you start! Remember this list focuses on Soul/R&B and is not in any order nor is it exhaustive.

August 13, 1982          He talked to Mama

 Eva, she brought that joker to our kid’s school!  Now what kind of bullshit is that? Why would she bring a man to our kid’s school function—knowing that I was gon’ be there too? I was humiliated!

I just don’t know what went wrong!  I tried to be a good husband to my wife; I took care of all the bills like a good man should.

I thought we were gonna work it out and be a family again-then she go and do this shit here!  I’m just so damn hurt!

Eva, if I’m hurt, how you think our kids feel?  What do you think they think?

You know, after she left me I just didn’t know what to do with myself.  So, I went and talked to her sisters and her mama and they didn’t know what to tell me.

Eva, I’m just beside myself.  My kids keep asking me when they mama gonna come back home and I just don’t know what to tell ‘em.  I mean, I been calling and calling and calling.  She won’t answer me!  She won’t even answer the kids unless she know they are calling from her mama or her sister house.

I just need somebody to talk to her.

Eva, would you talk to her for me?  Would you tell her what a good husband and father I am?  Could you tell her that she need to leave that motherfucker alone and come on back home?

He stopped talking… and started crying.

Mama looked at him and said, “It’s gon’ be alright, I will try to talk to her but I can’t promise you nothing.”

“Eva, that’s all I ask, just talk to her.  I know she’ll listen to you.”

 

August 14, 1982          She talked to Mama

Eva you just don’t know the hell I went through with that man.  Yeah he paid all the bills but he wouldn’t quit messing around on me.   I had women calling my house asking me to speak to MY husband.  I had one heffa try to tell me all about EVERYHTING they had done in bed.

Girl, I put up with that mess for a long time ‘cause we had the kids and I really didn’t have nowhere to go.  You have no idea how many nights I cried myself to sleep.  Some mornings I wouldn’t even look directly at my babies ‘cause my eyes was so swole from crying.

Then one day I realized that I couldn’t live like that no more so I got me a job and I started working.  I worked like hell and as soon as I got enough money saved up, I left his ass.

Yeah, I’ll admit that when I left him I started dating a manager at my job.  Eva, he is just so kind and gentle to me.  He was there when I really needed somebody.  He helped me get on my feet and get a divorce attorney.

Eva, for years I tried talking to my husband.  I pleaded with him to change his ways.  Girl you know we got good insurance so I called a counselor but my husband said we didn’t need help—he said that we could work things out ourselves. Eva he told me that counseling is for crazy folks and that black people don’t do no shit like that.

Girl, he didn’t change!  I even called our preacher but my husband said he didn’t want our business all over the church.  I got so pissed that I just hollered, “Everybody already know you fucking around on me—so we ain’t got no business!”

‘Scuse my language Eva, you know I don’t talk like this but the whole thing just really pisses me off!  I am still hurting about it!

Girl, I tried and I tried- You hear me?

Now I’m tired and I’ve had enough.

She stopped talking… and looked down.

Mama looked at her and said, “You know he asked me to talk to you about going back home right?”

“Eva, no disrespect to you but you can tell his ass I said to call one of them bitches he was screwing!”

She gave mama a big hug, said her goodbyes and left.

We never saw her again.  Last I heard, she took the kids and moved up North somewhere.

I didn’t want to get in trouble for listening snooping but I think mama already knows that I heard everything.

After She left, I felt kinda awkward.  I didn’t know what to think so I went on in the living room to sit with mama.  I told her that I had heard the whole thing and I asked her if she thought that He and She would get back together.

Mama lowered her head, looked at me and said, “No, because when a person has had enough– they gon’ have enough– and they ain’t gon’ want no more!”

At that very moment, the DJ started playing “If you think you’re lonely now” by Bobby Womack.

Talk about mystery and bubble gum?

What?  You never heard nobody say that before?  Don’t worry!  My French friend taught me to say those words whenever something really strange happens!  I say it in English– but for real, it goes:  Mystere et boule de gom-or something like that.

Anyway, all this husband and wife stuff is too deep for me!  I shoulda just went with my friends to see Friday the 13th Part III.

This probably gon’ be the last one.

🙂 🙂 🙂

Yessir…all that really did happen and my nosey ass was lurking around listening to the whole thing. And of course mama knew I was listening.  But y’all it was almost as if she allowed me to listen and hoped that I might learn something from what I had heard.

Well baby, let me tell you right now, I most definitely learned something and here it is:  Believe half of what you see and none of what you hear!  Oh yes, Brother Marvin had been telling me that for years via the lyrics of ‘Heard it through the Grapevine.”  Well, rest assured that it sunk in on August 14, 1982 when I learned that there is always more than one side to a story.

Baby, I had seen that family a million times and I thought everything was cool!

But apparently,

it

was

not!

Anyway!  What’s good in 1982? I see y’all made it here safe and in good spirits!  I just got back from Cousin Ron’s 21st birthday party in Texas!  Chile all I gotta say is Airmen know how to have a damn good time!  Ooh la la! My French friend taught me that one too!

That’s what’s up with me.  Are you ready to spill your tea?  Now y’all know I want all the details right?  Why don’t you give ‘em up at the after party in the comments section!

I’m ready to get it started!

And so…

My Jams ‘82

Call me by Skyy

YAASSSS Ladies!  This one is all about stealing your friend’s man!

The dickens you say?  Well hell a jam is a jam!  We can’t be bothered with morals and stuff!

“…Though your girlfriend is a friend of mine, here’s my number and a dime call me anytime!”

Hell if you gotta spot that joker a dime then he need to stay where he is!

“Satisfaction guaranteed!”

I’m a wonderful thing baby by Kid Creole and the Coconuts

Yeah it was a novelty song but I was a  pre-teen back then and I lived for this jam!

Never give up on a good thing by George Benson

I guess it all depends on whose “good thing” he’s talking about.

As we saw in the lead in story, what was good for He damn shole was NOT good for She!

No matter, George DID that with this jam!

Tell me tomorrow by Smokey Robinson

Baby this jam right here is so sweet.  The melody is so enticing and romantic.

I guess it has to be if you are trying to convince someone to have one last romp with you before they dump your ass tomorrow!

“…If you can’t be mine forevermore then let’s make it like I never knew …”

Yaaasss, tell me tomorrow Denzel!

Planet Rock by Afrika Bambaataa

BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM……

What in the hell is that?  Kids, you gotta understand that our v.82 ears were unaccustomed to the kinds of sounds that we heard coming from this jam!

But baby most of us got used to it!

Mama, however, did NOT!

Circles by Atlantic Starr

Chile, Sharon Bryant, the original lead for Atlantic Starr was the business—DO YOU HEAR ME?

That Queen Diva had her own way of working a jam.  That Sista was unique like Chaka Khan!

Just go play this one and listen to her say “…you got me so confused baby, baby, baby!”   SHiiiTTTT!!  I can’t call it!

The Gigolo by O’Bryan

Boy that rhythm guitar made a quick ass introduction in this jam!

It said, “Hello, I am the rhythm and I plan to rock your ass out!”

Hell I thought it was Ray Parker, Jr!

Again, it might be but I’ll let you check 🙂

O’Bryan?  Yaaassss!

Y’all act like y’all done forgot about this boy right here!

“He’s just a gigolo…I don’t think she really know!”

Don’t sleep on this one!  It had PLENTY of brass action too!

Are you serious by Tyrone Davis

Aw hell, back to that eternal question:  Should I get with this old ass man?

Again, I say, he coulda got it!  I don’t give a damn if he was 88; Ty was sexy as hell!

Shine on By  George Duke

Yeah, you forgot this one didn’t you!

It has all the sweet sentimentality that a gal like me needs in her life!

George ain’t no joke so please be clear that all of his musical compositions are coming correct!

Don’t get it twisted!

777-9311 by The Time

BAAAAAABBBBY!

If the rhythm guitar in “Gigolo” was saying “Hello,” the bass guitar in this jam is saying “WHATZUP!!!!!!”

I simply cannot with this jam!

But I must try!

First, here is a quick dance tip for you newcomers, if you want to dance to this song DO NOT FOLLOW THE DRUMMER!

The drummer is keeping his own damn time and this is NOT a play on words!

Some people swear that Prince played the drums on the original recording—not Jellybean.  Frankly, we may never really know….unless we ask Mr. Day and Jellybean’nem.

Anyway, to dance to this jam, start by following the rhythm guitar then rock out to the BASS!

But here comes the killin’ part:

After Morris talks plenty of trash he calls out “Terrrrrrrry!

And baby Terry Lewis then commences to go to WORK on that bass!

Gotdamn!!!!

Please, somebody go get me some water!

Apache by The SugarHill Gang

The kid’s will remember this from “The Fresh Prince of Bell Air” when Carlton and Will dance to this jam!

That damn Master Gee had my heart baby!

Don’t get me wrong, they all had skills!

Do it…Let me see you shake by the Bar Kays

Yeah, these boys totally revamped after the plane crash that killed all but about two of them;  Of course Otis Redding died in that crash too. Like I said in older “My Jams” posts, I can’t talk about it too much or I will cry.

Anyway, I love this jam even though it does NOT highlight any of the instrumentalists; in fact, it sounds like it was totally composed and performed on a synthesizer.

No matter, I liked it anyway!  But I did start to worry about the future of music when I first heard it!

Play at your own risk by Planet Patrol

“…If you think that you’re too hot to trot, I’ll take you to the top and then I’ll let you drop.”

Play at your own risk!

‘Nuff said!

Do Wa Ditty by Zapp

YAAASSS!

“Said I wanna blow… Do Wah…just let me blow…Do Wah Ditty…blow my thang…Do Whah Ditty”

Go ‘head on Roger!

It shoulda been you by Gwen Guthrie

This Queen Diva left us way too soon but baby she gave us some gifts before she did and this jam was one of them.

Here, Gwen laments over a love that just wasn’t meant to be.

With my back to the wind

I face a new horizon

Believe me when I say that it’s true

Even though our love is through

Gwen…girl… it be like that sometime!  But I say if you gotta walk out at least you walked out to a kicking ass bassline. YAAASSS!

Wait for me by Slave

Who in the hell wouldn’t wait when Steve Arrington says, “ohhh baby wait for me!”

I don’t know ‘bout you but I’m waiting for Steve!

God I love this song!

Favorite Person by The O’Jays

That’s my jam! (But aren’t they all?)  Anyway, I don’t just listen to this, I perform it!

Great music and singers never really go away!

That said, baby the O’Jays were still kicking it in 1982!

Don’t believe me?  Go check out this jam!

Oh yeah and while you’re at it go holler at “Satisfy you” and everything else on that Album!

“Out of all the women in the world, you’re my favorite girl!”

Something about that woman By Lakeside

I know Lakeside!  Don’t you worry — the fellas say that about me all the damn time!

Yaassss!

Another good SOLAR jam!

Show me where you coming from By Carrie Lucas

Aw shit now!  This right here!  What???

YAAAASSSS

I love this song.  This very pretty Queen Diva, Carrie Lucas, is working the hell out of this jam and she does it over a funky ass bassline that is reminiscent of Taana Gardner’s “Heartbeat!” Could that have been Leon Sylvers on bass?  I wouldn’t put it past him.

I TOLD y’all back in the late ‘70’s that SOLAR was NOT gon’ be bullshitting! Now I guess you believe me!

I am adding the video in comments! But remember it’s from ’82 so don’t expect too much!  Peep the pop lockers in the background!  Pop locking was the shit back then!

High Hopes by SOS Band

This is dedicated to She from He

Now go peep the into!!!

NOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just plain dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“… I’ll never, ever, ever come around to see you again….I had high hopes for you and me…thought we’d stay together eternally…!

“This can’t be…you with another and girl it’s killing me.”

AWWW Damn!!!!

Nights over Egypt by The Jones Girls

Talk about a smooth ass jam!  You’ll not find one smoother—I can promise you that!

The Walk by The Time

I fell in love with this song from the first freaking note!  Musically it just does it for me!

Oh but when you add a showdog like Morris Day to a bad ass beat you get some other kinda animal.

Your boy, Morris, was funny as hell.

Check out my favorite verses:

Damn, I’m ’bout to walk a hole in my Stacy Adams

What time is it?

Little cute guitar player, make your mama proud

I want all of Detroit City to stand up, clap your hands

Alright you Polaroids, stay in time with the drummer

Jellybean, don’t be so mean

Mr. Jellybean, turn it around, bass man walk downtown

Go on and walk, Terry!

Then there’s the hilarious dialogue between Morris and Vanity:

 

Say, hey baby, where you goin’?
I’m going home, I can’t dance like that
Well baby, that’s because you got those jeans on too tight
Now let’s just take ’em off

What do you mean, “Let’s just take ’em off?”
Come on, take ’em off, I got something for you to wear, here, put this on
Uh, you always keep lingerie in your glove compartment?
None of my women wear gloves, now put this on

But
But my ass, hey, a play on words
But all the girls will stare at me
All the girls in this neighborhood already wear camisoles…

Damn baby, how’d you get all that in them jeans?

It wasn’t easy
I know that’s right, well, I think you’d be more comfortable in this
I’m sure I would, I don’t know

Hurry up Grace, song’s almost over
My name’s not Grace
I know that, but hurry up—- Grace…

Okay baby, now check this out. We gonna walk ’til the song’s over
In other words, meet me at the bar in 32 measures, cool?
Cool.
And if you’re good, I’ll let you work the stick in my ride

Talkin’ cash shit!  (Lyrics updated, source for lyrics had a few typos)
Alligator Woman by Cameo

YAAASSSS!

I freaking loved this jam!  It had that whole new-wave thing that we were all trying to adjust our ears to! Y’all the drummer showed his ass a time or two on this one!  Listen close!  Maybe it was Larry!   Remember he was the drummer before he threw all the damn instruments away!

“You’re a mess I must confess….”

I know you got another by The Reddings (Yes those Reddings!)

Here come them Jawja boys again y’all!

This shit right here was funky as hell!  I don’t care what NOBODY say!

Dexter had that bass going EVER-Y-WHERE!

Peep these lyrics:

I just give up, I just give up on you

Everything I try to do

I just give up, I just give up on you

You always turn around and abuse

I just give up, I just give up on you

Time and time again

I just give up, I just give up on you

You sneak around all over town with your bad news. Girl pleez!

I just give up, I just give up on you

But it…don’t matter, don’t matter, don’t matter

Don’t matter, don’t matter ‘bout nuthin no mo!

YASSSS…The Reddings straight outta Macon, GA!  Just some good ole country boys with a whole lotta money!

Word to the wise, don’t let country boys fool you! They might talk slow but them jokers already 4 steps ahead of your ass!  Yessuh!

My daddy tried to warn me about them slow talking Jawja boys!  Your girl didn’t listen and let’s just say that things didn’t always bode well for me!

Ask Cousin Ron ‘bout them Jawja boys!

We don’t have to talk about love by Peabo Bryson

Alright, it’s time to slow it down!

I ain’t heard this one in a long time!  How ‘bout you?

Well baby, let me warn you, it will make your nature rise!

Hope you got somebody to work that out with! Or something…

LOL!

Jamie by Ray Parker Jr

Guitar extraordinaire!  Yes baby!  This joker is a beast on guitar.

Well this one was a nice little mid-tempo jam and Lil Lady G wore the grooves off it!

And now….Let’s see what Eva was bumping!

Love come down by Evelyn Champagne King

Sexual healing by Marvin Gaye

Let it whip by the Dazz band

The other woman Ray Parker Jr.

Muscles and Mirror, Mirror by Diana Ross

Mama used to say by Junior

Forget me nots by Patrice Rushen

A night to remember by Shalamar

Early in the morning by The Gap band

1999 by Prince

There it is by Shalamar

You dropped a bomb by The Gap band

I’m so excited by The Pointer sisters

So fine by Howard Johnson

My latest my greatest inspiration by Teddy Pendergrass

Dance wit’ me by Rick James

Ribbon in the sky by Stevie wonder

Cutie pie by One Way

Street Corner by Ashford and Simpson

I’ll try something new by A Taste of Honey

I really don’t need no light by Jeffrey Osborne

Dance floor by Zapp

If this world were mine by Cheryl Lynn and Luther Vandross

Keep on by D-train

Young love by Janet Jackson

I want to hold your hand by Lakeside

In the raw and Emergency by The whispers

Let’s celebrate by Skyy

Be yourself by Cameo

Knockout by Margie Joseph

The Smurf by Tyrone Brunson

Wanna be with you by EWF

Since I lost my baby by Luther Vandross

Yo’ mama by Wuf ticket

Who sticking it By sunrise

Keep it Live by Dazz band

Still water by O’Bryan

Gigolos get lonely too by The Time

Must be the music by Secret Weapon

Girl by Time

Imaginary Playmates by Rene and Angela

Goodbye 1982!  I love you!

Whew!  That should keep y’all occupied for a minute!  Meet me in comments so we can talk about the year that was, the memories and the music!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Liebster Award: Part 2

liebster-award-button

Thanks for ‘tuning in’ to part 2 of Seekthebestblog’s Liebster Award 🙂

As promised, here are eleven facts about our dearest Ron along with his responses to the eleven questions that we both were tasked with answering.

Enjoy!

 

Eleven Facts:

  • I was born in a small town in South Georgia.
  • I have one brother and three sisters.
  • I count things.
  • I think constantly.
  • I’m really very shy, but trying hard to overcome it. I even do some public speaking now.
  • I am a Christian and a Deacon in my church.
  • I have three sons and no daughters. I’ve always wanted a daughter.
  • I’m currently single but I’ve been married thrice.
  • I’m a retired Air Force veteran.
  • I drive a pick-up truck.
  • I’m a Paramedic by trade.

 

Eleven Questions:

  • Who are you? I’m a 6 ft tall, 250 (athletic) pounds African American male who likes reading and writing.
  • What is something people would be surprised to know about you? I’m a spiritual person but I also delve into the scientific and theoretical also. Psychologists would probably say that I’m in a state of Cognitive Dissonance, but I think I do a good job of reconciling any dichotomy that exists in my belief system.
  • If given a chance to be invisible, what would you do? Sneak into the White House or wherever they hide that National “Book of Secrets”. I want to know what they know!
  • What is happiness to you? Happiness is Love.
  • Your inspiration, and why so? My mother is my inspiration when it comes to educating herself at the age of 50, achieving her Master’s degree in education and becoming a teacher.  My father is my inspiration also, because of his educational accomplishments and his oratory skills.
  • What is your biggest achievement in life so far? Having and raising two spectacular sons, one of whom, is a graduate of Fort Valley State and is a Microbiologist. The other is an artist in his own right.
  • If you could start over, what would you change? I think I might have completed college before going into the military instead of waiting to earn a BS at the age of 54.
  • If given a chance to go on a date with a celebrity, who would that be? Kimberly Elise
  • Are you happy with your life till now? Yes.
  • Your favorite song? Work by Rhianna
  • What comes first, the egg or the chicken? Explain the reason. Here’s my dichotomy in action; If one believes in Creation, then the chicken came first, “God created the fowls of the air”. If one believes in evolution then the egg had to come first because, whatever mutation of the predecessor to the chicken occurred to make it what we now know as a chicken, occurred at the cellular level.

 

So there’s that!  Single ladies, did you notice that he said he was unattached! Um hmm!  🙂 🙂 🙂

Again, thanks for checking us out!  Don’t forget to join us this Thursday for “My Jams ’82” and Friday for the latest installment of Ron’s Time Tunnel.

 

Liebster Award!

liebster-award-button

I am so happy to announce that seekthebestblog has been nominated for a Liebster Award for new bloggers!  Yaaay!!!!

Friends, I cannot tell you how happy this makes us!  With that said, let me thank my ‘Cuz’ Tony Tone Vega for nominating us!

Now, I know that you noticed that I used the word ‘Cuz.’  Well let me clarify,  I started calling Tony ‘cuz’ after reading his blog.  Why?  Because, quite frankly, his ‘conversation’ sounds a lot like things that some of my own cousins would say.  So while we are not blood; we are still ‘cousins!’

So thanks again cuz! Y’all  please go check him out!  He is one funny dude!

Now let’s talk about my road dog!  My blood cousin, Ron!  What can I say?  If you have been here before then you, no doubt, have read his work.  That said, he is the truth and we share this award.

To that end, we decided that he would do a separate post to address all of the same questions that I am about to address in just about two seconds!  I already did the hard part by selecting and linking to the nominees!  Ron will thank me for that I’m sure!

So here goes!

Liebster Award Rules

1) Thank the blog who nominated you and link back to them.

2) Make a blog post telling 11 facts about you,

3) Answer the 11 questions from the blog who nominated you, and

4) Prepare 11 questions for those you will nominate.

5) Nominate 11 new bloggers (those who have less than 200 followers) by commenting in one of their blog posts.

Eleven Facts About Me

  1. I am young at heart and quite family-oriented.
  2. Although, I am a Black girl  who was raised in the South, I see myself as a global citizen.  When I was young, an older woman said that I was an indigo child—I know, go google it!
  3. I am a mother and I love and adore my children.
  4. I am an avid reader and I am a huge advocate for innovative children’s educational programs and efforts.
  5. I love music; I cannot sufficiently express how much!
  6. I love good food and drink.
  7. I like to cook and share my dishes with others.
  8. I love to laugh and I mean long, loud and often!
  9. I am a seeker of the best that life has to offer.
  10. I’ve always been spiritually aware and connected to God.
  11. I always want people to feel better about things after spending time with me.

Eleven Questions Asked of Me

Who are you? (in one sentence?)

I am that slightly off-beat girl that distracted the hell out of you in math class!

What is something people would be surprised to know about you?

I am an extroverted introvert!

If given a chance to be invisible, what would you do?

I need clarification, would I be able to walk through walls too?

What is happiness to you?

I am always perfectly content alone but I am most happy when I am spending time with family and friends. Nothing in the material world can touch those experiences.

Your inspiration, and why so?

I am inspired by the seen as well as the unseen.

What is your biggest achievement in life so far?

My two beautiful children!

If you could start over, what would you change?

Not a damn thang.

If given a chance to go on a date with a celebrity, who would that be?

Oprah, I’m just sayin’!

Are you happy with your life till now?

Yes, because I know that it is unfolding exactly as it should.

Your favorite song?

What? I wouldn’t know where to start?  I blog quite a bit about music so my favorite songs are EVER-Y-WHERE in my posts!

What comes first, the egg or the chicken? Explain the reason.

Which came first? I would venture to say a hen AND a rooster came first! Don’t question the LORD!  His ways are not our ways 🙂

Ok, so here are my nominees for this award.  Bare in mind that the rules require that the blog has less than 200 followers.  Well, I am not about to get into the number of followers that a blog has but I am selecting blogs I follow that I think are young like we are. God knows they might not accept but I am nominating them anyway.

Also I am doing ping-backs because it is easier.

The Virtual Stylist

2loud2oldmusic

Tune Up Success

Brother Askari

Stay See Something

Richard Norris Music Blog

Think2wice

Under Red’s Roof

Every number one

Happy Living

Loves lived loves lost

Nominees, here are your questions:

  1. What made you decide to blog?
  2. Do you have any special causes that you are passionate about? Tell us about one.
  3. What is your favorite movie and why?
  4. What’s your favorite way to spend leisure time?
  5. What’s the most interesting place you have ever visited?
  6. Where in the world do you want to go?
  7. What three things are you most grateful for?
  8. Are the words ‘blogger’ and ‘writer’ interchangeable?
  9. What is your greatest accomplishment?
  10. Is there anything that you would like to accomplish that you haven’t so far?
  11. What should everybody know about you?

 

Thanks for reading guys and Thanks again Tony Tone Vega!

 

 

 

Ron’s Time Tunnel: It Ain’t Slick A Damn!

TATCROPPED

 

My Dad, “Son of Comet,” had no siblings. Alas, Gramp and Grandaddy had only one child. However, “Son” had several first cousins who fulfilled the roles of “brothers.” This pack of wolf cubs shared tons of adventures “out in the country,” as Gene Brown’s farm and the rest of the old, “Mitchell Grove” community was commonly referred to as. As a matter of fact, their tight bond continued until their deaths, for all of the old wolves have now gone on to that greatest of all adventures: the “afterlife;” “the hereafter;” “the great beyond;” I’m talking ‘bout heaven, heaven, heaven; that old, “everybody talking ‘bout heaven ain’t going there, heaven.” But before they went, them boys made their mark in this world. Many years later, “Son” would relate many of those adventures to the eager ears of his own cubs–me and my siblings.

“Congo,” was “Son’s” first cousin on his daddy’s side. His name, of course, was not really “Congo,”that particular appellation was his sobriquet. I wished that I could tell you how he got this moniker, but I’m afraid I must disappoint, on that matter.  His mother was Aunt Annie Bell.  Now, Aunt Annie Bell’s husband, and “Congo’s” pappy was Uncle Croff who, in my mind, had to be the absolute coolest OLD man who ever existed, but I’ll share more about that dapper fellow in a later post. I also believe that Croff was “Son’s” favorite uncle, but when you think about it, how could he NOT be; “cool ass” Uncle Croff. But “Congo,” he was a horse of another color; what color? I’m not sure. Maybe he was “blue.” He could definitely BE “blue” at times, and I don’t mean melancholy.

“Congo’s” most defining feature, in my view, was his lack of half of his right index finger; his pointer. But the fact that part of that thing was missing, didn’t stop him from pointing it. He liked to wiggle it at us cubs, an action that always managed to send us into nervous giggles. It was weird, but funny at the same time; go figure. “Con,”as he was affectionately called by “Son” and the others, was also thin as a rail. He got that from Uncle Croff for sure. He was thin, but he wasn’t a pushover. He was a “Feist dog;” you know the kind who will bark and growl like they’re going to tear something up, but when “push come to shove,” his heart really isn’t in it. I’m told by a cousin, in that branch of the family, that his older sister, “Sister Babe,” took up for “Con” in many a brouhaha. “Con” would talk trash, start trouble, and then leave it to someone else to do the dirty work. But, what “Con” ALSO was, besides a “Feist dog”, was a master mechanic, he could fix any vehicle. He learned it in the Army. Fear not, “Congo” will be back for more adventures, but for now, I must move on.

Next, in this pack of wolf pups, is the subject of today’s post; “Tadpole,”or “Tat” for short. I think his “tag” derived from the fact that he was the youngest, and therefore the smallest. “Tat” was the son of “Son’s” pappy’s youngest sister, Aunt Babe and her husband, the “jokester,” Uncle Harry. As the youngest of the bunch he was usually at the end of any pranks and hijinks, conjured up by the other devils. In later years, “Tat” was one of the smoothest of these criminals and my favorite.

Every time I saw “Tat,” we went through the same routine; he’d take a boxing stance, crouching a la a light-skinned, super sweet, “Sugar” Ray Robinson; he’d then feint a couple of jabs and uppercuts at my midsection. I’d double over, in REAL anticipation of the FAKE “blows” which, of course, never came. “Tat” also possessed another skill, much more interesting to young cubs than a half-hearted imitation of “Sugar;” he could make his ears move at will. I don’t mean a little wiggle, I mean MOVE; like two “Sugar” Ray Robinsons dancing on the sides of his head!

What “Tat” couldn’t do, at a young age, was cuss. All of the older boys had gotten that “skill” down pat, except “Tat.” So, according to “Son,” “Tat” was standing in front of the mirror one day, brushing and rubbing his hair, in a vain and futile attempt to get it to “lay down” like “Sugar’s.” What he obviously DIDN’T know was that “Sugar” had the help of a product called, “congolene,” a hair straightener gel made from lye!

Using this product, usually resulted in a “slick” hairstyle called a “conk” (from congolene. I wonder if that’s where “Congo’s” name came from, hmmmm.) Well “Tat” didn’t have any of that. All he had was “elbow grease”, and after many minutes, that wasn’t working.

Well, as would happen, the other boys walked in on “Tat” trying to slick his hair down. Laughingly, one of them asked the young cub, “Hey man, is it slick yet?” to which “Tat” stuttered stoically, “Na, Naw man! It, it ain’t slick a DAMN!” The wolves howled that day, for sure!

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS THIS: Some things are just not meant to be, and no matter how hard you try it still AIN’T GONE BE “SLICK A DAMN”! (Come up with your own, if you don’t like mine. I won’t be mad at ya!)

 

Join us next week for; “CREEK, CAN’T FISH!”

My Jams ’81

1981 pic

Warning:  “My Jams” posts contain adult language and situations.

“Gwin, you better hurry up and come get your plate ‘cause the food is gettin’ cold!”

Today, mama cooked fried pork chops with collard greens and macaroni and cheese!!! By the way, I helped her grate the cheese for the macaroni.  I figured I better watch her while she cooks so that when I grow up I’ll know how to cook for my own family.

Anyway, so you know I quit violin right?  Daddy was a little bit mad about that because he bought me my own violin after spending two years renting the one I had before.  Don’t worry, he’s gonna sell it so he’ll get his money back.

Oh yeah, the reason why I quit was to become a majorette in the marching band this year. Sorry, but I can’t do violin, chorus and band practice.  That’s too much!  That’s why I quit violin.  Shoot, I wanted to play “Star Wars” like Ms. Hargrove but we ain’t even got to the lesson where you learn how to make your fingers trimble on the strings.

Besides, I can’t wait to march with the band.  We gon’ play “Let’s Groove” by Earth Wind and Fire.  We already practicing our routine.

Guess what?

All the majorettes added parts to our dance.  I added the part where  we jump up, kick and land close to the ground and twirl our way back up.  We’ll do that when the band plays the part “So we can boogie on down, down, boogie on down…”  Everybody likes my idea!  I made that part up because I know I can jump and kick higher than all the rest of ‘em.

That’s enough about that.

Do you wanna know a secret?  Ok, I’ll tell you but you have to promise me you will NOT tell a soul.

Ok, so you remember the boy I was telling you about that I like?  Well today, he was at my friend’s house and there was nobody home but my friend, this boy, another boy and me.  Well, my friend told me that since I like the boy that I should go all the way with him.  That’s not exactly what she said but you know what I mean.  Anyway, she pushed me into the den with him and shut the door behind her.  He was standing by a stereo that was playing “Am I dreaming” by Atlantic Starr.

You know I was shaking and FREAKING OUT right?

I didn’t say a word, I just stood there looking like a mullet fish.  So he walked over to me and asked me if I was scared and I said, “yes.”

Then…

He gave me a really big long hug, lifted my chin and kissed me on my lips.  Then he told me that I didn’t have to do anything that I didn’t want to do.

Well I didn’t want to do anything and I told him that. Then, he smiled and said, “You a sweet girl, I’ll see you later.”

Atlantic Starr was still singing when he walked out the door.

Oops!  I gotta go for now!  My food gon’ really be cold plus I wanna watch ‘Solid Gold’ when it first come on.  I already hear them playing “Let’s get physical,” by Olivia Newton-John.

Oh yeah, my favorite Solid Gold dancer is Darcel, she’s the one with the long hair—she knows how to get down!  Somebody told me she was married to one of the Spinners but I don’t know if that’s true.

See ya later!

🙂 🙂 🙂

 

Chile, y’all better watch those kids!  I don’t give a damn how well you know their friend’s family!  All kinds of crazy tomfoolery happens at the homes of people you ‘know.’  Now to be fair, parents can’t be everywhere but just remember that children can be sneaky as hell!  I got two of them jokers so I know from experience.  Hell, I was sneaky and so were you!

Baby, that little fast ass heffa had Lil Lady G hemmed up in a room with a mannish little boy.  Chile I was in danger of making a serious life choice waaaaaay too soon.  Just imagine if young Mr. Carribeanish had decided he didn’t give a damn what I wanted.  That whole little saga could have gone bad-wrong!

To thicken up the plot, did you peep the song that was playing in the background?  “Am I Dreaming” by Atlantic Starr?  Whaaat?  Oh and let us not forget “Send for me!” Baby, the mood was SET!

I think it’s safe to say that I am flat out lucky that I came out of that situation with all my girl parts intact.

HA!

Anywhats, so what’s going on in your corner of the world in 1981? Are you getting along okay?  Anything I should know about?  Don’t hesitate to tell me!  Meet me in comments at the after party!

And so…

Let’s do this…

My Jams ‘81

Get down on it by Kool and The Gang

Just in case you didn’t know, that ain’t Kool singing.

Baby that’s cool ass “JT.”

That brother know he was ice cold on a microphone!

Talk about a sexy crooner?  He most assuredly goes on Lady G’s list—sorry Chevvy, “I saw him first!” LOL!

“Ooooooooh ooooh ooooh get down.”

It Must be Magic by Teena Marie

“Weeeeeeeeee!”  Oh don’t act like you don’t know! That’s Lady T’s signature entrance!

Stop the damn presses!  Stop the presses!

Lady T has ENTERED the building!  Yessir!

Baby this Queen had Melvin Franklin and all the damn Temptations spitting a little fire on that joint!

Who else do you know with that kind of clout?

Now don’t get me wrong I know that Melvin Franklin was Rick James’ ‘play uncle’ and that may have had something to do with it but Teena…I mean Teena!

Horns, strings, bass….all the sounds that I love the most!  I see T. Wayne two stepping!  Ron is catching up and Geo is straight chilling!

Do y’all miss Lady T like I do?

No worries, you will see her again on this list!

Lady G always has and always will be down with Lady T!  Baby that’s Bible and Church!

Stepping out by Kool and the Gang

This one didn’t get the credit that I think it should have!  If you don’t know it, please go check it out!  But, I’ll betcha my core followers know this joker!

What’cha Gonna Do For Me by Chaka Khan

Damn! Just Damn!

“Uh huh a-uh huh!”  Queen Chaka so bad she can make an utterance sound like high opera!

I simply cannot with Chaka!

But do you hear that bass guitar turning and churning all around in that damn thang? What?

This my shit right here!

Make that Move by Shalamar

Aw hell….The first few notes and I am DEAD!

Howard acted a damn fool on this jam and that’s a good thing!

Again, it has all the essential elements that I need in a song.  It’s got me some horns, some strings and some bass!  Some piano!  Some rhythm guitar….All the shit I need to kill me DEAD!

By the way, DEAD is good!

Oh but have you heard “Somewhere there’s a love just for me?”  SHIIIIIIIIT!!!! They killed that one too!

Two Hearts by Stephanie Mills with TP

A musical unicorn of sorts!  I mean, where do you see two masterful singers willing to work together to sound so freaking good?

I JUST CANNOT!

I heard it through the grapevine by Roger Troutman and Zapp

Mama left planet Earth mad at Roger Troutman for committing what she considered a form of blasphemy when he recorded this song using the voice box thingy.

Did I mention that Roger died years before she did?  That’s how deep it ran with Eva!

Anyway, please allow me to make a minor digression in order to tell you a true story!

One day, mama asked me if I had ever heard of Roger Troutman.  I said, “Yeah mama, everybody know Roger Troutman!”

She then went on to say:

“I went to Pyramids to get that new Shalamar record. Well a limo pulled up and a man got out so I said, ‘excuse me, who are you?’ and he said, ‘Hi m’am, I’m Roger Troutman.’  She then said he opened the door to the store for her and they both went on about their business.

Needless to say, I was chomping at the bit!!  I said, “Mama you know Roger Troutman, he’s the one that sings with that voice thingy!”

Mama looked at me and barked, “Wait just a damn minute!  Is he the one that fck’d up “Grapevine?”

I said, “Well…yes.” But I was thinking “hell to da naw!”

Mama said, “If I hadda known that…..”

Y’all I can’t tell you everything she said! And for my own safety I didn’t even mention that he remade ‘Midnight hour’ too.  That would have been deadly–and not the good kind of deadly either.

Anyway, let’s just end the story by saying that Roger did, somewhat, redeem himself with her when he made ‘Computer Love.”

Whew!!! Despite all the drama, I gotta admit that all kinds of magical things happened when mama was around!

Now, frankly, I liked Roger’s version of Grapevine!  The long version is my jam!  He showed out!

“Don’t you leave me… don’t you leeeeave me girl!”

“Heard it through, heard it through, heard it through…tear it up!”

On the beat by The BB&Q band

Yessir!  That’s Brooklyn, Bronx and Queens!  All the way up there in New York!  I think Tony Tone Vega is from around that way somewhere!

Honey if I didn’t know any better I would’ve thought that was Nile Rodgers playing rhythm guitar on this jam! Hell it might just be; but Lady G simply cannot be bothered to research it!  If you want to know for sure, google it then let me know.

Yaasss!  Get it boys!

Let’s work by Prince

Yasss! Baby that thang got down off his magical Pegasus– with his pretty self –and commenced to show his entire ass with this jam!

BASS!!!!!  Yasss!

Walking into Sunshine by Central Line

When I first heard this song I remember saying to myself “Self, you done heard this music from somewhere before!”

Yasss baby, this song samples the Duke of Earl’s “Get down.”

Baby sampling or interpolating or whatever you want to call it was new territory back then so some people were a bit confused!

Either way, I loved it!  I still rock it to this day!

Thanks UK!

“I gotta get away to see what’s right for me!”

Bon bon vie by T.S. Monk

“Gimme da Bon, Bon, Bon, Bon, Bon, Bon, Bon, Bon Vie!  Give me the good life”

A funky ass ode to living your life right!

Yasss!

Are you single by Aurra

BASS!  BASS! BASS!  Bassline!  I JUST CAN”T !!!

I’ll guarantee that T. Wayne will pay $5 per bass slap!

A bassist’s heaven!

And love goes on by Earth Wind and Fire

This is one of those back in the back on the b-side jams!

Yeah well you best believe that Lady G knows it intimately!

I actually read that Phillip Bailey said it’s one of his favorites despite the fact that most folks don’t know it.

Go check it out!

Holla back in comments.

Love has come around by Donald Byrd and the Blackbyrds

“I’m so glad now love has come around!”

T. Wayne!!!! Please tell the peoplez about this jam!

This is one of those jams that folks liked when it was out but then forgot about it!

Well I implore you to revisit this joker right here!

FIRE!!!

Freaky Dancin’ by Cameo

This one and pretty much EVER-Y-THANG Cameo did from about 1976 up until 1982 was funky as hell!  Do you hear me?  If funk is your thing, please don’t leave off Cameo!

‘Knights of the Soundtable?”  WTF?

“In order to move like this, you gotta have confidence…”

Heartbeat by Taana Gardner

BABY…

BABY…

BABY…

Wake your ass up and check out this BASSSSSSS!

This joker has been sampled so much that it is unreal!

It’s all about the BOTTOM on this jam!!!

Oh yeah and that little tweeting on top is nice too but the bottom is the boss right ‘chere! Just plain NASTY!

You got to give it to Taana, that Queen handled all of that!!  Yasss!

DEAD! DEAD dammit I am DEAD!!!

 

8th Wonder by The Sugar Hill Gang

“With the pow-wow boogie and the big bang bang……….and you don’t stop!”

OOOOWWW!

Ok, I can get with this whole rap thing!  This was the jam! This is when rappers could really rap and have fun.  The rap game done devolved something awful save one or two dudes/chicks out there.

Master GEE? Say whaaaaaat?

He was mine….in my head anyway!

I guess I “just been hit by the Capricorn King!”

Nights…..Feel like getting down by Billy Ocean

Yasss baby!!!!

I love this damn song!  Again, this is another one that I take with me to this day!

Another shout out to da UK!

Something about you by Ebonee Webb

Yeah…you thought it was Prince didn’t you?

SIKE!

 

Y’all it’s time to check out Mama’s list:

Can’t go for that by Hall and Oates

Why do fools fall in love by Diana Ross

When she was my girl by The Four Tops

Lady by the Commodores

It’s a love thing by The Whispers

Take my heart by Kool and the Gang

Ai no corrida by Quincy Jones

I’m in love by Evelyn Champagne King

Never too much by Luther Vandross

Give it to me baby by Rick James

Double Dutch Bus by Frankie Smith

Fantastic Voyage by Lakeside

Snap shot by Slave

Ghetto Life by Rick Jams (Whole Street Songs album)

Silly by Deneice Williams

I’ll do anything for you by Denroy Morgan

Sweat til you get wet by Brick

Get it up by The Time

This kind of Lovin by The Whispers

Before I let you go by Frankie Beverly and Maze:  Aw shit now!

Your love is on the one by Lakeside

Funky sensation by Gwen McCrae:  Y’all know this-it’s been sampled a lot

NULL or in other words ***NOT Mama’s : Numbers by Kraftwerk, a bonus for rap buffs—it is the basis for a lot of early rap hits—whole bunch of counting in German.  You ought to know it!

Back to mama’s:

For the lover in you by Shalamar

Bad Lady by Con Funk Shun

Here’s to you by Skyy

Searching to find the one by Unlimited Touch:  Ah yeah!

Feel me by Cameo

Love in the fast lane by Dynasty

Feelin’ must be real by The Skool Boyz

Fire and Desire by Rick James and Teena Marie

Controversy and Do me baby by Prince

 

And now we’ve come full circle in a way…..

Let’s talk about the two jams that started this whole series, I present:

Who’s been kissing you by Haute Cuisine and Gigolette by Ozone Featuring Teena Marie.

If you are a bass fan, Gigolette is FOR YOU! And since I am a Bass fan it damn shole is for me!!!!  It’s another one that was overlooked by the masses.

Anyway, you probably already know that these two jams were highlighted in the post “That’s My Jam.”

Friends, “That’s My Jam” is the post where I announced my decision to start the “My Jams” series on Thursdays!  I guess you can call it the mother post!

Funny, how one thing can lead to another one and then it’s on and popping!

Now, let me be candid, I have always been extra, extra, extra sentimental during New Years!  Sometimes, I have trouble letting the ‘old year’ go.  Baby, 1981 was no exception, in fact, I found that particular year to be very hard for me to let go.

Believe me when I tell you that I really wanted to keep 1981 in place for some reason.

Maybe one day I’ll discuss this with a counselor– but, for now, the reasoning behind all of that will remain a mystery!

So, it is with a heavy heart that I must bid 1981 farewell–again! Damn!

Hey, what are your favorite memories or jams from 1981?

Join me for the 1981 ‘My Jams’ party in the comments section.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Selections from Ron’s Time Tunnel

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As promised, today I am sharing a few of my favorites from Ron’s Time Tunnel.

Just so you know, it was no easy task sorting through Ron’s work with the goal of picking 4 or 5 favorites.  Why?  Because all of his stories are that freaking good!

Yessir, it was, indeed, a difficult task but I managed to select the following:

A Boy Called ‘Man’

A Man Called ‘Boy’

Stornado!

The Sermon Part I

The Sermon Part II

The Sermon Conclusion

Remember, you can find all of Ron’s stories in “Ron’s Time Tunnel” in ‘Categories.’

Enjoy!

 

PS

Happy Anniversary Mama and Daddy!