Lovely Obituaries Come From Well-Lived Lives

One of the hardest things that I ever had to do was write my Mother’s obituary.

Trust me, it wasn’t for lack of content.

No, it had more to do with the emotional turmoil that accompanied the act of writing parting words for my first love.

So, content was not the issue.

The fact is, Mama lived a wonderful life so there was plenty of verifiable substance to cover.

Knowing this, I proceeded to write about her longstanding role as “Universal Mother.”

Mama took care of everybody!

To her it didn’t matter if you were 9 or 59+, she made sure you had what you needed.

But, if you acted like a fool, she would cut you to the quick.

Mama didn’t play!

Excuse my digression. 😊

In my writings about Mama, I couldn’t help mentioning that she was hilarious!

I am a witness to the fact that serious people can actually be quite funny!

Most times unknowingly.

Mama was notorious for being a bit devilish- which is actually a term of endearment in the South.

For the uninitiated, “devilish,” means “playful” in a practical joke-ish kinda way.

In addition to that, I felt it was important to stress that Mama was fiercely protective of those she loved; and of ANYONE, strangers included, who had been abused or needed help.

No doubt, Mama was a calm shelter for those who needed it most–and I wrote about that too.

Some time later, at Mama’s Celebration Of Life, someone commented, “What a lovely obituary.”

Well….

Honestly, it was a lovely obituary because she had lived a loving life.

It was, indeed, a life well-lived.

So, the next time you partake in woeful fantasies about how you wish to be remembered after you’ve died, consider evaluating what you’ve done before and what you are doing right now.

How have you treated others?

Were you compassionate when it mattered most?

Who have you helped?

It’s easy to be kind to family, friends and people who meet silly prerequisites.

How about being kind to people that you don’t know particularly well, or who fall outside of your comfort zone?

If you find yourself missing the mark as it pertains to these questions, then, in the words of one of my oldest and dearest friends, govern yourself accordingly.

Today, you can create your own life well-lived.

PASS IT ON!

LadyG loves YOU!

A Family Conversation: A Prayer for The Dying

Today’s Topic: Death, Dying, Loss and Grief

“A Family Conversation” is a storytelling audio series that features weekly discussions between blogging cousins LadyG and Ron Brown on current events along with favorite posts from each other’s blog.

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Crossing that bridge with lessons I’ve learned
Playing with fire and not getting burned
I may not know what you’re going through
But time is the space between me and you
Life carries on

It goes on

Just say die and that would be pessimistic
In your mind we can walk across the water
Please don’t cry it’s just a prayer for the dying
I just don’t know what’s got into me

A Prayer for the Dying. Performed by Seal. Songwriters: Isidore / Seal / L. Coleman / W. Melovin 1994
BMG Rights Management US, LLC

This week the cousins discuss LadyG’s post, The Black Book, which details important lessons that she learned about death, dying, grief, and loss while working in hospitals. During the conversation she also brings a more recent perspective on loss after working as a Patient Advocate for breast and gynecologic cancer patients.

In addition, Ron offers some valuable insight from his 30+ years working in the medical field.

The Black Book: Closing life’s busy-ness/Cancer/Dying in Clusters/Celestial Discharges/All my 2 minutes
Not Today Jesus!/Boundaries and Burnouts/Salute to Healthcare workers/Causes Worth Facing Death/Respect Life/Comforting-ish Words

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We started today’s discussion on current politics and the loss of civil rights giants, C.T. Vivian and John Lewis, including a commentary on “Black History.”

It should be noted that the deaths of these heroes encouraged Ron to select today’s post.

I’d like to dedicate this post to all of the patients that I loved and cared for before they made their transitions. I love you all and I will see you again. For the ones who remain, I pray for your continued wellness.🌹

Also a very special dedication to our late Grandparents, “Mother” and “Daddy;” and to LadyG’s mother, Eva, and to Ron’s father, Fletcher.

Rest in Peace to everyone who passed away due Covid-19.

May God watch over the families and friends who mourn the loss of anyone who has made the transition; at any point in time.

Reach out to me here in comments if you want to share your experiences with death, dying, loss and grief. Also, tell us how you’ve managed to cope with loss.

Celebrate life and love while you can!

Love LadyG and Ron♥

On the lighter side:

Interesting links referenced in the post:

Drunk History’s: Birmingham Children’s Crusade

Widow at Funeral Meets Jesus

The Time Tunnel (Ron Brown)